Today is the 40th day of my smoking cessation. Can’t really say it was tough, although it wasn’t a walk in the park either. For the last 7 or 8 years, smoking was not a ‘craving’ thing for me anymore. Meaning that I don’t have to have a cigarette right after I woke up in the morning, right before breakfast. Sure, I was like that in my younger single year, back home. But since I moved here, with the kids and everything, smoking was an on/off habit to me. Definitely off during both pregnancies and when the kids were smaller. Then on again afterwards.
I started smoking when I worked as a journalist, back in 1996. I was twenty three, although the very first time I tasted cigarette was in high school. Working as a journalist with 90% male coworkers who most of them were (and still are) smokers, I became one too. Especially because back then, there was no such thing as ‘non smoking work place’. Everybody knows that Indonesia’s like the smoker’s heaven, one could smoke almost wherever and whenever. Even in an air-con room. Watching my seniors typing up an article, kretek on their mouth, and a mug of hot black coffee nearby; I thought that was the coolest thing ever. One said, “It helps my writings.” I thought he was bull shitting me. But after a while, I experienced it myself. It did help me focus, especially when deadline’s approaching.
Since I mostly hung out with them outside work, plus my best friend was also a smoker, that nasty habit had gotten into me even deeper. In a club, in a car, after a meal, while waiting, on the phone, when I talk, almost all the time. First thing I look for after I got up in the morning would be my Marlboro Menthol (or Sampoerna Menthol -clove cigarette with menthol, imagine that- when I broke). Before bed, right before I brush my teeth, was the ritual of smoking; just to complete the day, I suppose.
But here, after the morning sickness, breastfeeding and all (plus the limitation of places to smoke), that habit has been deteriorating. It’s now more like a habit, something I’d automaticcally do after a meal or when I drive. It had found a different ‘purpose’. I found it relieving to smoke when I got stressed out. I told my super nice doctor, that when I got frustrated or depressed, smoking really helped calming myself down. I felt that as I exhaled, my trouble would blown away with the smoke. “Yeah, very poetic. However, lame excuse,” he said. Ouch!
I have not had a cigarette since August 1. At that time, we took a fishing trip up north to help us through it. We thought, it’d be easier to be away and actually doing some activities, instead of trying to quit and stayed at home doing nothing. We went to Ashby, MN for the fishing part and to Minneapolis, MN for the ‘city’ part. I got a chance to have a lunch with an Indonesian friend and her hubby. The trip went quite OK. Not perfect, but OK. I also had a ‘breakdown’ about five days ago, due to a PMS-related reason, and I did two puffs. That’s it. I threw it away immediately because it tasted horrible.
Whoever say that quitting smoking is easy, must not been a heavy smoker. Nicotine addiction is so evil. I know this from a personal experience. The withdrawal is so painful for the person who’s quitting, and being near that person isn’t so fun either. But unlike alcohol addiction which could harm other people beside the user, no police officer would stop your vehicle in the middle of the night and as, “Sir, have you been smoking cigarette a lot tonight?” No judge would order you to go to a jail then rehab for smoking 2 packs of Marlboro a day. There’s no ‘punishment’ nor authority pressure to have someone successfully quitting smoking. A smoker is on him/herself to try to quit. A help from family/friend and probably smoking aids (patches, gums, medicine, etc) would help. But most of all, you’re on your own. When a cigarette maker blatantly lied that ‘it is not addicting’, I was so mad because it is too!
I just need Dan to tell me that he won’t go around near me or even kiss me if I start to smoke. I quit right away. Heh.
@V: But you’re not a heavy smoker either, correct? That is a nice threat from Dan :p
Yeah, I wasn’t a heavy smoker, but lately there are times I want to start to smoke again, when I get really depressed, but yeah… his threat works just great lol :P. But I know you can do it, you’ve had it down to 40th.
Most of my announcer friends who smoke take advantage from this filthy habit. They say it’ll keep their voice thick, dry, husky, and keren. But not for me though, i’ll keep my cempreng voice anyway… and glad that I’m not addicted to It.
Vit, my doctor once asked me, would I prefer to be on antidepressants but not smoking or the other way around? As you might understand, being away all alone in a foreign country, could make you depressed. Money wise, in short term, I would say smoking. Those antidepressants aren’t cheap. But then, do I really want to die young from a lung disease? Not really.
40 days and going… sometimes I wonder if I need to get myself a pair of boxing gloves and a sand bag :p
ichi: that is true. smoking could make your voise huskier and deeper. with a sore throat as a side effect 🙂
I started to smoke when I was 16 y.o and been quiet heavy one, I can finished 1 pack in 2 days.
At 2003 or 2004 (can’t really remember exact year) I went to rave party in Anyer Beach, had a blast party and I finished 4 to 5 packs that night only. Afterwards, I felt like my lung was full of smoke and I can smell the clove everytime I breath, I got really bad masuk angin (yeah wearing skimpy clothes from 7pm to 7am at the beach wasn’t a smart thing to do) and I got really sick with it.
Try not to smoke for a week and the next week was fasting month so it kinda help me quit. The worst part was when I had a shoot and all of my team was smoking arrghh… it was hard to hold back the temptation to smoke, but then I nailed it. I quit smoking completely until now and I couldn’t stand the smell of it, it makes me headache now.
If I weren’t sick, I probably still smoking till now.
keep us posted. this one will be fun!
I quit smoking a few times before. Like, 140 times or something. I need cigarette to function. You think i’m addicted?
good luck!
I smoked from my 16th till my 23th, I was forced to smoke by my own doctor due to my health issue (I risk a breast cancer gen, it is in the family). I wasn’t a heavy smoker though, 1 pack in 2 days. I went cold turkey.
That was 13 years ago.
Sometimes I still long for a good old Sampurna Mild, especially after finishing a meal. To be able to inhale the kretek aroma brings me memories in Indonesia.
Ah Din, you will succeed. Once your body is detoxed from nicotine, you will have to train your mind, controlling the longing for the ciggies.
Oops, correction: “I was forced to smoke by my own doctor due to my health issue” of course I mean “I was force to stop smoking by my own doctor …..”
@ecky: Good thing you got sick!
@treespotter: I know how that goes. Gutless flip-flopper, some people called me. Smoker. Non-smoker. Hubby’s been trying on/off to quit, no luck. We’ll see about this one. I think it is harder for a heavy smoker to try to quit in Indonesia.
@yoyen: Thank you for the support. Love the smell of Sampoerna too! With our trip to Indonesia coming up, I’m panicking if I’d be able to stay quitting. My mom’s smoking, my sister, my brother-in-law, that guy in the Padang restaurant, everybody. Oh great.
My bro is a heavy smoker. Mum once bought some herbs which she said was a vitamin and he took it suddenly he didn’t like smoking. He said the taste was disgusting. But then he stopped taking the vitamin and now is back to smoke. I wish he stops..:(
Din, all of my family are a heavy smoker. Mom can stop it but suddenly she’s back to her habit again.
My late father, were a smoker before, 5 years after he stopped smoking, he’s suffered of nasopharing ca.
Finally he could pass from the ca, totally free from the ca. It’s quite a miracle for me since 5 years ago the doctor had told me that I have to follow his wish.
He died not because of the ca, but my grand pa died because of lung ca and he also a heavy smoker.
Me … surprisingly I can’t smoke and the couldn’t stand either for the smell.
But you’re right, only you, who can handle your smoking addiction 🙂
‘ta, i really don’t want to end up wheezing and suffering from the lung cancer, emphysema, or copd (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease). i do want to stay ‘clean’. he heh, sounded like a drug user. i always have the heebee jeebees when i see the commercial about it. a person has this hole in her throat and when she talks, she sounded like a man. very low, almost growling kind of voice. yikes!
I smoked from the age of twelve up to 5 August 2005. When I was 18 and in college, I started smoking up to two packs a day. When I was 21 and working, I smoked between 2 to 3 packs a day.
I read an article about a female smoker who got cancer in her jawbones and had to get her jawbones taken out. They reconstructed her jaws using some bones from her thigh or something. She became really ugly. I refuse to be ugly. So I quit.
It’s been three years, one month, one week and 6 days since I quit smoking and I haven’t had one since. Life is beautiful without cigarettes. My ‘cigarette money’ goes to other more useful things, my skin and hair has never been in better condition, I don’t wake up in the morning with the yucky phlegm in my throat.
Downside is, food taste better, which drive me to eat more.
But everything else is much better. Quit, and do it cold turkey, there is no other way to succeed!
That video is priceless!
One morning I woke up to take the trash out I noticed a copy of the Jehovah’s Witness mag “Awake” stuck in the door of the apartment across from me. On my way to the trash room I saw a copy stuck in every door. When I got back to my place and didn’t see a copy on the floor it hit me that I was the only place on the floor that they didn’t stick their propaganda in.
I was momentarily insulted, until I saw the sticker on my door that read, “Warning: protected by the Devil himself.” At first I thought, “that scared them away.” But once inside I wondered, “with a sticker like that on my door if ANYONE needed their help and warranted their assistance it was me!”
By the way, my favorite practical joke is going to the J.W. website (watchtower.org) and requesting them to go visit friends of mine, early on a Saturday morning. Never fails to amuse me, and piss my friends off.
Sorry, commented on the wrong post.
I’ve lost a ton of weight, quit smoking pot, quit drinking, etc. Quitting cigarettes was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. Two years later I still smoke cigs when I’m drunk. I have no desire to smoke the next morning, but get me buzzed and I need a cigarette. It’s amazing to me that they are still legal, with how bad they are for you and how addictive they are.
that is why I tried so hard no to taste it. i think i’m going to be the heavy one, if only i got a chance to try to do a little puff. hihihi
@Creepy: Hey, np. That little bastard is highly addictive. I can’t believe it. Every time I’m in a pickle, I thought, “Hm… wish I had a cig.” A-m-a-z-i-n-g.
@melly: *as Yoda* A strong will, you have, little one.
Quitting? Not easy at all! After almost 15 years I still can’t kick this damn habit 😀